Wednesday 4 January 2012

"Well, snow?? WELL??" and other stories.

Bring it, ice-bitch!

Well. As an update to my "preparation for the big freeze" blog of November time, I am disgruntled to inform you that no snow, or ice, or blizzards, or cataclysmic avalanches have occurred! Not around here anyway. Yes the weather outside *is* frightful, and the fire *is* so delightful, but the noisy goits battering against my window, and the dripping down the chimney are not the finely carved wonders which are snowflakes. Rain. Just rain. Oh and wind, don't forget wind. Rain's malicious bastard wing man. I hate those gits. Yuk and sulk.

I should have known I had sealed our fate to a wet, mild, miserable winter when I found an affordable snow shovel which fits comfortably in my boot. I'm such a fool.

Oh well. Perhaps snow will yet come, who knows. Here are some other stories:

New Year


Apparently it has just been the beginning of a new year. I have two thoughts on this subject:

1) Pah. "New Year". Everyone knows a year is a cycle and never stops or starts. A "New Year" just means we have a new artificially human number to write after it when we do boring things like think about finances, fill in legal documents etc. Pah.
2) Hurrah! It's a whole new world full of possibility and things I can do to change my life forever!

These two ideas do seem pretty inimical, but humans are not logical things. Especially not me. I think both of them at the same time. But their ranking depends on my mood.

Do you have any interesting new years resolutions? I have only the ideas that I have every new year ever.
"this will be the year when I get thin and fit!" I've basically given up with that one. The world is full of "easy ways to get thin". E.g. this from New Scientist. But the problem is I love eating chocolate pretty much constantly, which I don't think these easy ways can really accommodate.

(Speaking of "easy ways" to do something, in a newspaper recently we were reading about easy ways to save money. They were things like "charge your rechargeable items at work" and "try not to buy stuff". Who are these unsung genii, and why are we not worshipping them?)

I think I probably need to have some short term achievable goals. "This year I will buy milk, and replace my car's rear windscreen wiper". In that case, I've already achieved 100% success! NYRs FTW!


A few more things to mention. Futurama is genius. I just bought myself season 5 as a late Christmas present and am enjoying it. Here is an example of how it is awesome :) Also, using Fry as a brilliant example, I really want to introduce myself to people from now on with "Hello, I'm Helena. I can eat a hot dog under water!"
However, although it is great, whoever markets it is a massive ball of fail. It came out on the 26th December! 26th December?? What were they *thinking*?? I did ask Father Christmas for it, but he sent me a letter saying that even HE could not access these DVDs prior to their release date. But he said he'd sent some of the elves round to beat some marketing sense into the troglodytes who chose that date.


Random point number 3920: There is a blog for everything! Here are some examples.
Llama font! (say it with llamas)
Animals with casts (why...? just why.)
Goths Up Trees!
Disapproving Rabbits

One ironic point. The Blogger spell check doesn't recognise the word "blog." Or, in fact, "Blogger". Ironic? I'm not sure because some people get very upset about the misuse of "irony" when it's just coincidental, or...something else. But if it's not ironic, it's something a bit like irony. (disclaimer complete).

I think that's about all for now. Hope all is grand with you and all of the world!
Loves.